girl : rIsing

allison sylvia

fichtelberg

[ (Soma)tic Upon Entering - I will stand by the door and greet each person with a meaningful handshake.moment of eye contact => (touching it to my third eye->heart chakras) will hand them a scroll.

This performance will be a living being -

by getting a true sense of the audience

I will understand the energy of the room.

know how best to wield my words.

.when the audience settles so do i

i take my seat.half lotus at center stage

[ a bench on either side

subway sets the scenes ]

.be buddha.

.mountain sits.

i will remain in a tall posture

until [ sound ] begins.

[ wind.through the trees

frozen.mountaintop.melting.

.flowing.fading.

to the streets that carry me

hOMe

.brooklyn ]

i.slOw.shrink in to child's pose

arms back.to my sides.

[ voice above ]

Given away

at the hands.of cold rock

tastes the bloody flesh of letters

torn from words.

Hair billows in the distance

taken captive because all she wanted

was a pencil,

stones are thrown at her spine.

Smells the word no

as soon as she sits

on the wind broken benches.

Keep out! they say.

They dispose of her brain

throw away desktops

and hands raised.

Men slap away the chalk dust dreams.

Body succumbs to shattered glass.

Battered head lies

ripped, left for the dogs

to eat away.

All of a sudden—

the soles of her feet tremble

as she listens to the chord

of a distant drum

inside her.

She transforms into a pillar,

holds up the frayed edges of the earth

allows her fingers to be sodden with graphite

and erases scars at her mouth.

She lays pavement to new road

allows herself to sleep

on dreams about fever-pitch

that harvest paper

to write her tale where

the dirt is still trodden heavy

with cologne-soaked lies.

A new kingdom is brewing

where lips whisper

girl

rise

rise.

m.t. (age 15)

2:00

FUTURE MANIFESTATION- this part will be recited by

m.t.

.not me

i roll uP

to greet the sUn

HMOAH

L to the A

pen taps down to page.Tick needle to record.whirr

BEGIN

.Panic.Comes.In.Waves.

.Strobing.Through.My.Veins.

fOcus

.breathe.

THE DrAgon whips head rOUnd to glAre at passersby.

If looks could kill.

You have been weighed.

Painted lids narrow :

bore in.

You have been measured.

Little of interest.

You have been found wanting.

Fleshy white peaks that ridge her spine through peekaboo.back undulate

as she turns away.

Her hips.swish with a hitch

and a snaP of her tail as

it flicKs through the air

with the hiss and the poP

of the stopPed DownTown bOUnd.

Whooshing winds flirt with skirt and skirt and skirt.

Summer is upon us.

Sneak a peek at exposed cheek.

bing

bong

whirrr

First class.

The corner seat.

.On the middle.

.right talon.

.of the crow.

.across the aisle.

rides a stetson :

silver & bucking & proud.

Flick.

.lick.

Flick.

.schlick.

Spiny flick

after spiny flick navigates

her 4.87 by 2.31 universe.

She wears the keys to

her alabaster tower round her neck.

.chastity.

She quarter turns as she snacks on snack size fruit snacks.

Smack.

Bingbong.

Alert.

Smooth - whirr - click.

Doors gape at ghastly Penn. Moment of stale silence.

Whir of the close.

.Click.

Return.

Compose :

She settles into her nest, perching, feet adjusting,

on black board.

Rubber grips paper.

Cat eyes pointy past ears that disappear

with the gentle sweep

of soft thin gold.

The keys of the standing

big buff man jinglejangle :

click and clack.

JingleJangle

.keys that dangle.

Belles on toes.and.Keys on loops.keeping track of

.their pursuit.

The MODERN knighT :

sword at the hip and ready, sheath of the carabiner, three dollar armor of the

.thrift shop top.

Keys that stake

.a claim in the land.

Jingling jangling

.proof that he owns.

He dares to call

.his home his own.

The spurned landed gent.

Our knights can only

RENT.

Click clack

Click clack.

.lick schlick

lick fap.

Journey taken

of myself

by myself

for myself.

Hip hap happening.

A young pilgrim boards the Rockawayflower.

Black bowler hat sits atop

a side.bang swoop.and.flare.

What's under there?

Small coquettish smirk. Quiet calculating stare. White lace collar

against the black.

SmackSmack.

ClickClack.

The train it rumbles down the track.

Lost in thought.

The doors - they open.

The pilgrim brushes past. Look and see :

______

168

Street

______

SHIT.

Barely slip through as bingbong doors close.

Close shave. I'm saved.

Time is lost and trembling.

Swivel Backpack round

to front.

Frontpack.

Chestpack.

.I.Want.A. .fannypackfannypackfannypack.

Pregnant with my books. Comforting weight of

the world.

Compressed chest.

Always fall asleep on my chest.

Used to dream of sex just to fall asleep.counting sheep.

sexy sheep.

Baa baa black sheep

fuck me in the night

Yes sir,Yes sir

Hump with all your might

.on a roll now.

Tie me up and throw me down

Smack my ass

and rip my

gOWn-OWn-OWn

.cat in heat.

.lordosis.

Take me use me and abuse me. Leave the safe word

at the door.

Spank me bite me.

Fuck the tight me.

More. Whore. Sore.

Petal of the red.red rose

lies there in my path.

Sputterlaugh.

I just might be a naughty girl

[ sound begins ]

Joyce Joyce :

channeling Joyce.

Drop the act.

What's my voice?

4:00

[ (Soma)tic 5:00 Dance :

Legions(War) - Zoe Keating ]

THE GREAT OSCILLATION

.Destruction.Criticism.Renaissance.

To my Liberal.Arts.Degree,

many thanks.

LITERATURE, though not the first Art, was the first glimpse

into each unique conception of the human condition.

Whoever controlled the word, controlled the collective memory of the people.

Religion is the way of life of a People, based on geographical development of that Culture -

crystallized into literature.

My father is Jewish.

My mother was Roman Catholic.

She converted not for my father but for Faith :

Judaism better explained her World View.

Religion is just that - an intensely personal choice.

Everyone is entitled to their order : their beloved.balance : their solace : their faith.

I.for one.would only believe in a GOD who knows hOw to DANCE.

earth, SUN, mOOn, water, air - my only gods, since the dawn of this time.

Growth.and.Decay.

expansion, collapse.

If we consider the Cosmos,

we're but a tiny wave of EnErGy.

.BuT.you.goTtA.hAve.

Faith.ah.Faith.ah.Faith.

I.hAve.ABSOLUTE.fAith.

YOU

Let me recite what history teaches. History teaches.ThaT.iT's.GoT.tO. be OUrsTORy.

[ (Soma)tic Conversation ]

Excuse me.Miss

.what bE.A.Utiful combination of.

.THINGS aRe.you?

[ .i will drink my fill

sign thank you

bring needle

back ]

We are a completely NEW Race of people.completely NEW faces the likes of which this world

has Never before sEEn :

WE ARE ORIGINAL

GodDammit.HaLelUia!MotherFucking.PrAise.the.lOrD!

We need to shed their rules - they no longer apply.

Let us square off.shake hands.and agree :

We are not so different, You and I.

Stop hemming and hAwing.

TorPedo through the M-i-l-e-s of Bullshit and get to the cOre :

Hello there. It's a pLeasure to meet you.

.we are the convergences of vastly different cultures colliding.combining in one

INDIVIDUAL.

That's quite a heavy load to bear.

It's a load we're meant to Share.sharing.is.caring -

HELL is other People.

.but.

What.If WE're heaven?

.Return - to - HOME.

I am.PrOUD. to KNOW.your

beautiful.BLACK.blOOd.

.courses somewhere.dEEp.in my veins.

There.is No.Flag.left to hide.behind.

There.IS.only US.

the ONLY one that.I'll

sTANd by is

YOUR Freak.Flag.

.so leT iT flY.

a Nation is as great as its ode.

So let's write anew.

Let this be our Code -

It's very simple :

Don't be an Asshole.

: everyday.in.every.way Decide that You are Beautiful.

.our DESTRUCTION happened young.only old enough to Know.

WE were expected to be People much too soon.

WE felt bigger than our trajectory.trapped in their Legacy -

THE RESULT

will.all.the former EMO kids,

pLease.

.sTAnD.

.uP?

iT.is.NoT.OUR.faulT.

WE are the Students : shackled to the desk, staring only at the Forms on the PowerPoint

: taught by a false Light.

About writing papers - I feel like I had the Fear.of.God in me when I was eighteen.

How many of you 'just sit down and write a paper'?

Or do you block out big sections and gradually fill in the small details.skip from section to section.highlight what still needs to be done.bright florescent pink.SO.when you sCroll you see your

Progress.

sCulPtural writing

we were taught to plan

we were taught to organize

we were never taught to

AND

my fellow IMer

remember how we used to whi l e.

.away the hOUrs.

feel a panic risE in the space between replieS?

- WE -

instinctually.CreAted a NEW Language

that was highly referential.dependent on punctuation for meaning.

.we timed responses to.

.win.an.argument/out.wiT with.quotes.

we grew.knew each other's secrets fAster.

.felt brAver pressing -Enter- than we ever.would in.person.

when we would.have.had.to lOOk sOmeOne in the EyE

and SAY exactly what was on.OUR.mind

and then - all at once - the smoke cleared

and we started getting.in each.other's.Pants.

WELL.can I tell you a story?

you Can.

That's long since been established.

Why.not try.to get inside my mInD?

together WE can find

the answers that I'm sEArching for.

.so.here's to You

.every.single.QUEER.

who.really feels we.could.go

either.way -

hey.hey.hey.

.I love you in a.

.we.would.make.one.kickass.

FU.

.siON.

-HAH!-

.kind of way.

We already know we're headed toward.

.ze.end.of.ze.wORld.

I.ProPose.WE go.down singing.

.Oh sAy.can you seE.

.I.

.DeCLAre.

- INDEPENDENCE -

.the - INTERNET - is.OURS.

.and.it's Time.we TAke iT.Back.

.why.don't.we put.on our Big.Girl Panties and.Decide :

we are WOMEN. we are MEN. we are HERE.and.we are NOW.

iT.Is.Time.

that WE. - blinking - sTeP into the.sUn.

All we have to do is create&challenge&imagine&discuss&

.BE.

All we need is you people.

.and.I.do.mean.

YOU, People.

But we need capital! -

you cry.

I say :

Let's step out from under their blOAted CORPORATIONS, pick ourselves up by the bootstraps and BE cooperative CAPITALISTS.

YES

we CAN get successful Degrees.CAREERS

OR :

WE can have BEaUtiful lives.

ULTIMATE Becoming :

[ sound begins ]

ART finally.for art's sake.

Let us paint a new Sistine

put our mark on Permanence

and when its doors : they open wide

to spread the JOY

WE.refuse.to hide

we'll affix OUR plaque

Stating FACT :

___________

W E L C O M E

- to.the -

NEW WORLD

GOD save you, if iT.is.righT. that HE.should.Do.sO

it is, at long last, ABSOLUTELY uP.to

YOU

10:00

[ (Soma)tic 5:00 Dance :

Mi Mujer - Nicolas Jaar ]

fell

into an all.consuming love

one stop from home :

She was already there when

bing

bong

I sat : center seat across her corner.

Legs crossed : left thrown over right,

foot extended in the aisle,

two.inch ridged rubber.soles

lead to black and white checkers :

black laces.

JiggleJiggle

leads eye up round bony ankle :

psoriasis riddled shin :

wide battered knee.

Swish.Tap

The foot is dropped

- anchor -

and

after an adjustment,

replaced with

the right.

Eye is drawn to

the bulky black shape

beside her :

cello.

Her long tapered fingers

fiddle.fiddle with black pen : flip.flip.flip

through the thin graphing.notebook resting.perching on wounded knee :

guide the wayward angled curtain back behind small ear.

She

vibrates

with

: CREATIVE energy :

profOUnd and twitching inspIration.

Black slouchy shirt keeps

sliding past slim shoulder :

concealing.revealing

thin black strap.

Slender neck leads to strong chin.

A peek of perfect lips past

protruding cheek.

Strong brow with thin plucked line guards the shock of piercing blue :

green.

Stunning.

Hers flicker

.meet mine.

Heart leapS.

.Skips a beat.

Quickly look away.

Watch her

from the side.

Unpainted red lips :

two round mounds curve up

from within to meet in a pointed dip beneath her button nose :

middle line curves up to puddle

at each end :

bottom lip a pouty pillow with a subtle center crease.

Smitten :

.I am she.

Embarrassed by the revelation : quick! avert the eyes.

Focus on that seat.

Peripheral.

She starts to pack her things.

Parting will be such sweet sorrow.

I dare to trace mine back to hers.

Full bOld faCed stAre :

A CHALLENGE.

She bOres in : pours in.

Shudder.

gasp.

I have to shut mine fast.

cheek.

Warmth spreads from neck

.down

quivering

spine :

across

.burning chest.

bing

bong

I am left

a breathless Fool.

- whirr.click -

It starts with a mUse.

ONE NOCTURNE IN B#

.and I could certainly use a release.

bing

Doors close || bong! on Bedford.Ave

and Brooklyn.

Tunnel bound :

|| a

sOUnd.

Turn & seek & find

through standing

elbows.arms.bent knees

a.Cello - & - a.Man.

BUM!BUM!

he starts to thrum : DEEP!

: DOWn.

RattleRattleRattle squeak!

We rattle low

beneath the street.

TickaTickaTick -- || ThrUm

.RattleRattleRattle S

c ch!

r e e

Put pencil

forcefully in fold and :

This Side of Paradise and :

stOw in fanny pack.

.Zip!

Wait for the end of a RattleBump Clack!

Stand :

survey :

resent the

L.train.crowd.

Want to swing from

vine

to vine

to LIVE inside his sOUnd.

Twitchy small peep!

as I hesitate to speak :

try to find some other way

to sneak from seat to :

Bump.BuhdumPah!

Beat.

I move a little step --

to the hands that grasp the rail :

I want to . get to . the

CELLO.

Hands loosen :

twitch open :

helpful :

happy to oblige.

Quickly thank the faces . that stare in . subtle . slight confusion.

Slither through the spaces made by body :

body :

.BlOCk.

TickaTickaTick

|| tock.

bOUnCe.cars jOUnCe : bulky block bump

moves aside

: there's a space that opens

w i d e.

Cinching in :

slither through :

silly affected

pHew.

Y O U ::

5:00

[ (Soma)tic 5:00 Dance :

I'm Into You - Chet Faker ]

.fool.

i never learn

here is my hand

love

it's such a relief

to sing the word

that day in your cellar.lair

my heart&soul escaped its cage

to dance with yours.in thrumming air

rejoicing.destined for this age

the fire that I saw.ablaze

has hardened.frOze in winter days

a new intensity resides.black holes

poisoning blue eyes

my love I promise I will go

to the event of each horizon

to pull you back from your despair

the only question.ask yourself :

do I dare? and do i dare?

patience is a virtue

I hope persistence is another

as I have yet to learn to wait

and in my haste I've laid to waste

a forbearing lover's subtleties

I know I have come on too strong

but in another time&place

I would have written you a song

one for every single day

I love you

ETERNITY

let me number the days

first.turn to me

i will count the ways

I want to be the one to woo

write true words to make you swoon

in this life I am the sun & moon

you are golden.Orion

my warrior.my muse

ground your pursuit

of the Pleiades

your journey

brought you

to my land

.still lost.

I keep this mortal hope

I only want to hold your hand

it's Artemis from whom you flee

this time reverse your course

swim toward the shore

come home.to me

I promise you

I mean no harm

only yearn for refuge

in your arms

please

hold me close&let me linger

you are the emptiness

between each finger

the space between my tongue&roof

put your faith in destiny :

fear is dead

LOVE is the only truth

I pledge allegiance to your heart

come place yours beside mine

will you let me write you poetry?

please.please.please

this time

say

yes

HMOAH

HELL(BECOMING)EDEN

ode.to.me

i know myself

& that is all -

a poet's only job

is to tell

the truth

violate me

in the violet tIme

in the vilest way that

yOu knOw

mama

who bore me

mama who gave me

no way to handle things

who made me so sad

mama,

the weeping

mama, the angels

no sleep in heaven

bethlehem

come on, babe

we're gonna

brush the sky

spank me

bIte me

fUck the tIght me

WhOre

sOre

mama

who bore me

mama who gave me

mama the angels

who made me

bad

i hold with those

who favor fire

come on, babe

why don't we paint the town

there's a part

i can't tell

'bout the dark

i know well

come in under the shadow

of this red rock

a heap of broken images

these fragments i have shored

against my ruin

i had not thought

death had undone so many

here is a fruit

for the crows to pluck

for the rain to gather

for the wind to suck

for the sun to rot

for the trees to drop

here is

a strange & bitter crop

are you -

coming to the tree?

it is a

tree of life

for those who hold

fast to it

all they say

is Trust in what is written

wars are made

& somehow that is wisdom

thought is suspect

& money is their idol

& nothing is okay

unless

it's scripted in their

BIBLE

I swear to tell

the whole TRUTH

nothing

but the TRUTH

so help me

if i abide

to your will

will i never have no pain?

i'm tired

but my body's hungry

how about

going back to sleep

for a few minutes

& forgetting

all

this

nonsense

it's generous to say

you didn't think twice

you have a large brain

but a spinal cord

would suffice

some say

the world will end

honestly

i can't believe

it's burning again

like the first fire

just gonna stand there

& watch me burn

but that's alright

because i like

the way it hurts

something always

brings me back to you

it never takes too long

o, i'm gonna be wounded

tell me

the name

of your wound

o, i'm gonna be your bruise

take this ode

if you wish

i have nothing

in it but

yOU

haven't you heard

a WORD,

how i want you?

grant my last request

just let me hold you

don't shrug your shoulders

lay down beside me

unreal BODY

fear death by water

lay me by

the riverside

so i can die

i heard the sound of thunder

it roared out a warnin'

heard the roar of a wave

that could drown

the whole world

heard one hundred drummers

whose hands were a-blazin'

heard ten thousand whisperin'

& nobody listenin'

heard one person starve

i heard many people laughin'

heard the song of a poet

who died in the gutter

ashes.ashes

please be still

'cause i'm complacent here

by the rivers of babylon

where he sat down

and there he wept

when he

remembered

zIOn

unfortunately

it was paradise

how many roads

must a man walk down

i used to walk along

the opposite side of the road

and made others get out

of my way

nothing

you can say

can stop me

going

hOMe

HMOAH

you can stand

on the arms

of the williamsburg bridge

crying

hey man

well this is babylon --

i find

shelter

in this way

under cover

hide away

can you hear

when i say

i have never felt this way

couldn't keep it in

heaven knows

i tried

something

has changed

within me

something

is not the same

i'm through with

playing

by the rules of

someone else's game

too late for

second guessing

too late

to go back to sleep

it's time to trust

my instincts

close my eyes

leAP*

arise

thy light is come

(hands in gassho)

Every day in every way

I strive to be the light and the flame

(bow.raise bodhi mind)

May I let my body BE

(bow.raise bodhi mind)

May my mind let me SEE

(bow.raise bodhi mind)

May I again return to ME

somewhere

over the rainbow

i hold with those

who favor

lIght

sUn in the sky

you know how i feel

breeze driftin' on by

you know how i feel

it's a new dawn

it's a new day

it's a new life

for me

all shall fade

the flowers of spring

the world and all the sorrow

at the heart of everything

but still it stays

the butterfly sings

sleep in peace

when day is done :

that's what i mean

and this old world is a new world and a BOLD world

for me

I've heard it said

that people come

into our lives

for a reason

bringing something

we must learn

and we are lead

to those

who help us

most to grow

If we let them

the way you wear your hat

the way you sip your tea

the memory of all that

they can't take that away

from me

so let me

say

before we part

so much of me

is made from what

i learned from you

you'll be with me

like a handprint

on my heart

i want you

to come with me

wake up

i am a hole

PUNched out of the sky

i am a fallen shard of dreams trying to fold itself into the dust

i will show you fear

in a handful of dust

do i dare disturb the universe?

in a minute there is time

for decisions and revisions which

a minute will reverse

i have measured out my life

with sugar spoons

i swallow the universe

and find myself still inside

drown me into matter

force me back into

feeling and form

follow your skin

am sewing

my return

to the sky

(you)

are the source

the point from which

i pivot

imagine the moment

pull it down the spine of time

i catch hold

of your hand

and feel

(you)

inside

breathe in

clamor

breathe out

stillness

how long until

you drink me up again,

my edges liquid & light

dissolution

occurs before revelation

rIse uP

past your skin

i need

your original face

expand without abandoning

do not be afraid

keep walking through

the darkness

the sUn always rIses

i found my place

to rise up from

in the mountains, there you feel free

i leave my palm prints in the grass

here is a testament

to living love

this

is where i am going

this is where

i will return

i have been

to the

mountaintop

looked uP

into their

ancient

glittering eyes

are you

a warrior

not?

.settling back to lotus pose.

there

something

in your heart?

.be buddha.

.mountain sits.

i am

LOVE

know me

know all

hmm.O.ahh

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